Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Brain Droppings

*Please Note*

The opinions, beliefs and viewpoints expressed herein by the the author are the author's own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs and viewpoints of the Sioux Falls Storm or the Indoor Football League, nor do they reflect official policies of the Sioux Falls Storm or the Indoor Football League.
“The best laid schemes of mice and men” the Robert Burns saying goes… “often go awry” and so too do the best intentions of the off again, on...well, let’s be honest, off again indoor football blogger in me.   The 2016 Indoor Football League season has crept into its penultimate week, and I’ve nary a scheduled pitstop made.  I won’t bore you with the facts of the season, the playoff races, and all that. “Jim” over on the Indoor Football Forum group on Facebook/Twitter does a WAY better job of keeping up with things than I could ever hope to.  I sometimes think the guy never sleeps.  So what you’re about to read is a massive brain dropping of my thoughts and feelings about everything that’s gone on since I last posted.  


To the absolute shock of absolutely no one, the Sioux Falls Storm are, once again, leading the league in attendance, and wins.  But there aren’t the same numbers as last year.  Then I began to watch highlights from the other games and saw Sioux Falls isn’t the only one having troubles getting butts in seats.  It’s.. well... everywhere.. Iowa had a couple thousand, maybe, if I squinted and give them the benefit of the doubt for an in-state game against Cedar Rapids a week ago.  Sure, the Barnstormers were eliminated from the playoffs, but this is your rival from a few hours away.. Surely some fans from Cedar Rapids made the trip to boost numbers.. But sadly It didn’t look that way.  We’ve read articles in the Spokane newspaper about how Sho...err...Empire attendance is down by close to 50%... I’m neither a mathematician, nor an accountant, but that can’t be good for the bottom line.  

So what happened?  Could this possibly be the karmic repercussions of rule changes that switched the entire focus of a sports league?  I mean, surely there was one person on the Titanic that was like.. “I tried to tell them about that bleeping iceberg, but nooo.. No one listens to the people that actually watch for things like that”  Karma, maybe.. Has the sport finally jumped the shark...probably.  

For the most part, I think people don’t like developmental leagues.  There are a lot of markets that suffer from what I’ve called “D1 syndrome” where if it’s not top shelf, it’s crap.  This is why, attendance in every league that's attempted 100 yard professional “outdoor” American Football has been lackluster. The competitiveness, the athleticism, the quality could all be top notch, but no wants to see Bubby Brister throw passes to Chad Johnson if you know what I mean.  

There could be a lot more to the drop in attendance across the board, but to me that’s certainly part of it.  I know even my diehard interest has waned.  When I spend more time commenting during games about the Colorado kicker wearing the biggest thigh pads on the field (no lie) and telling the Colorado kick coverage team that black shoes don’t match navy pants.  Something about your product is flawed.  

SO, here is an incomplete list of incomplete thoughts about why he IFL sucks.
  1. Veteran Rule. It’s led to sloppy penalty filled games, and an overall drop in the quality of the play.  It isn't until after most players have given up the hope of ever making the NFL that they truly become great indoor players.  They adapt their games to the field size, they make full use of their charisma with the proximity of the fans, and they actually start to care about something larger than themselves.  In Sioux Falls names like Blackburn, Bryant, Fluit, and Murphy, are used with reverence and without first names, because none are needed.  But we also would recognize Mark, Terrance, Nate and Leif on the street, and more importantly they’d recognize us.  
  2. The games take TOO damn long:  This is probably more a Sioux Falls specific problem, but it sucks. 90,000 in game promotions, an inexplicable 20 minute halftime (that’s actually normally closer to 30 on my watch, and yes I've timed it, twice) and a kickoff that used to happen at 7:05 like clockwork is now more of a casual 7:18ish kind of thing.  You know, whenever… Surely the mom and 4 kids behind me can stay out until 11. I’ve heard talk of moving the games up to 6:05 or even worse, shortening the games to 12 minute quarters.. Yes.. let's shorten the ONE THING most of us came to see, and use timing rules these guys haven’t played since HIGH SCHOOL… Instead, how’s about we simply work to improve the pace of play.. 20 second play clock, since the refs can’t spot the ball with any urgency anyways. “Professional” on field staff.. I love the “promo girls” as much as the next guy, but the refs need to get the ball to get it spotted.  12 minute halftime.  The NFL uses this number and it seems to work for them.  I’ll even allow 15 for teams without a ton of media timeouts.
  3. Geography: I love the fans that have driven and or flown all the way from Washington state to Sioux Falls for a game. Heck, I love ALL fans that come to Sioux Falls and watch games.  They stop by the tailgates, take pictures, talk football, and oddly, occasionally,  genealogy.  They bring cheese. They’ve brought local craft beer from their home towns, and footballs missing an entire panel. It sickens me that I have to drive past two indoor football markets that are still semi thriving to get to our closest road games in Des Moines, and Grand Island (4.5 hours each)  The level of professionalism and talent  isn’t the same between the CIF and the IFL.  It’s noticeable.  But you know, I’m not a “D1 Syndrome” guy, and the Wichita v Sioux City game over Memorial Day weekend was damn entertaining.  First, because dear God Chuck Wright is still playing football.  He’s 35.  He’s only slightly younger than his head coach.  Hell, I think they played together.. For sure against one another..anyways.. Second, it was a damn entertaining game.  Just as entertaining as anything Sioux Falls has been involved in over the last decade.  I know, it’s never going to happen… the bridges are burnt, scorched, demolished.. But man what a nice fan and travel  friendly league it would be with Wichita, Sioux Falls, Sioux City, Dodge City, Salina, Chicago, Bloomington, Grand Island, Omaha, Green Bay, Cedar Rapids and Des Moines... pass the dutchy on the left hand side
  4. The players suck too.  No, not all of them.. But enough of them.  I’m not talking about their athletic ability.  Lord knows they’ve forgotten more football than I ever knew, and a good chunk of them we’re just born the last time I put on a helmet and shoulder pads.  But there are far fewer entertaining players than there used to be.  They’re all still trying to move up… trying to get the CFL tryout, that slightly bigger AFL check maybe.  They aren’t looking to make business connection, or find a home in Sioux Falls, or Green Bay, or Des Moines… it’s a different time...a different league…a different player.
  5. Eversport…aka IFLLIve.tv you wanted me to PAY $110 dollars for a season of games that by all the 3rd hand accounts I've heard have barely worked.. No thanks.. Not when I can watch the CIF games, and listen worldwide to the audio streams for free.. Sure, I get what I pay for, and the ole Silver Fox ain’t as smooth as he used to be.  But hey, I’m not out any money for a substandard product either.  There’s a line in the movie The Shawshank Redemption…”Get busy livin, or get busy dying..” time the IFL did the same with its attempt at streaming its games.  Make training for team or arena staff that’s responsible for this mandatory, or just quit it altogether and save the time and effort.  

As for the league itself.. Well, in my opinion, things aren’t looking good.. Attendance in Billings, Colorado, Wichita Falls, Cedar Rapids and Des Moines is at a level that can’t possibly be making the wallets of those ownership groups happy.  Oh but wait.. Our saviors out of Utah… the FANchise.. Now, officially known as the Utah Screaming Eagles have signed on to compete in the IFL for the 2017 season.  The more I read, the less enthused I become.  Sure, these are smart businessmen by all accounts, and it looks like they might have the financial wherewithal to make a serious go of it.  But this notion of crowdsourcing teams names, an app to call plays, and not all fans being created equal, and some of the other things I’ve read..  I’m not buying any of it.  Seems like a sham at best, and a scan at the worst.   

So there you have it folks. A barely proofread, largely incoherent, completely grammar free rant.  Slainte!